We have become a society that often measures the worth of an individual by their appearance. There is so much emphasis on having a beautiful body by exercising, dieting and using all kinds of products that guarantee you physical beauty, to be the envy of others. I remember watching a show called Extreme Makeover. In one of their programs, plastic surgeons transformed a woman considered ordinary into a drop-dead gorgeous sexy woman. She received applause from the audience for her willingness to undergo all of the physical and emotional pain this surgery involved. She felt it would change her life for the better. She was no longer a plain Jane in the eyes of others. She was like the ugly duckling who became a beautiful swan.
She was beautiful before the surgery. She wasn’t the kind of woman who could be a model. Her attractiveness was who she was inside – a kind, gentle, caring, and intelligent woman.
Unfortunately, the plastic surgery changed her for the worse. She was the heart-throb of many men. She dumped her boyfriend, who loved her for her character. She told him she no longer loved him.She became obsessed with her appearance. She developed into a vain person. Her desire to be accepted by men who were handsome made her into an emotional abuser, user, a manipulator. She made it her mission in life to inflict as much damage upon men as she could. Her worldly physical beauty became her weapon to exact her revenge on the men and women who when she was a teenager had made fun of her, who had teased her for being overweight, who said she was ugly.
There was a lot of pressure put upon her by her family, friends, and peers to become a sex goddess. She was finally getting the acceptance she had craved for so many years. In time she came to see how shallow her life had become, but by then it was too late. She had become completely opposite to her giving self. It reminds me of the book entitled The Picture of Dorian Grey. In a bargain with the devil, a young man received eternal youthfulness in return for his soul. With each evil act, his picture became uglier. He became corrupted by darkness. Dorian’s picture had become repugnant. He couldn’t stand to look at it any longer. He saw how his friends became older and died while he never aged, and remained handsome. Fire destroyed his picture, killed him and condemned him to eternity in hell.
I’m not saying Extreme Makeover didn’t have positive outcomes. There were people who were disfigured and shy before surgery, who became more beautiful and confident. They didn’t ditch their boyfriends, spouses, and friends. They didn’t choose to be involved with superficial people, who judge others by their physical appearance. They didn’t have the emotional weight of their perceived ugliness hanging over them like a grey cloud. But what does this say about our society that anyone feels the need to go to such extreme lengths to be accepted? The reveal on Extreme Makeover as their hometown is in awe of their vastly improved appearance, only serves to reinforce their belief that their beauty is measured by what they look like on the outside, not the beautiful and kind people they are on the inside.
I share with you a video about a woman who was told she was ugly because she was overweight. Listen to her story. It has a beautiful ending to a new beginning.
Please let these Scriptural truths sink into your soul.
“For the Lord does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart” (I Samuel 16:7, NKJV).
“I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Wonderful are Your works,
And my soul knows it very well” (Psalm 139:14, NASB).
When anyone says your ugly, I pray you will come back to these thoughts I have shared.
You could never be ugly in God’s eyes. He thinks you’re beautiful. Don’t believe your critics who say you’re ugly. They don’t know what they’re talking about.
If God says you’re beautiful then you are. Say that to yourself as many times you need to whenever you feel ugly. Write these thoughts on a card to carry around with you wherever you go, and keep it in a private place in your home to read when the need arises. Take the card out, and say these thoughts silently to yourself or read them aloud in privacy. “God says I’m His beautiful perfect creation. I’m the apple of His eye (Psalm 17:8). That means I’m cherished by our Father. If He says it then it must be true. That means everyone who says I’m not beautiful and valued by God is a liar.”
Where do lies come from? They come from the enemy of our souls, the Prince of Liars.
Please never forget beauty is more than skin-deep.
Kevin and Karen Osborne are psychotherapists and pastoral counsellors. Kevin is studying to become a chaplain and professor of Psychology specializing in Pastoral Theology. Karen enjoys doing cross-stitch while I like writing and singing songs. Karen makes me laugh when she sings the kitty bed-time song saying, “It’s that time. It’s the bestest kitty time of the day!” Kevin enjoys teasing the kitties and making them do kitty dances with music. Their kitty, Catherine, loves it when kitty daddeh sings All Things Bright and Beautiful. Kevin likes doing impressions. He tells children’s stories and helps others with their problems using his hand puppet, Dr. Teddy, who is a therapy bear. He is a partner with us in our counselling practice.We are available to assist with worship and preaching to give busy pastors and ministers a much-needed break. We offer in-office, and phone counselling to anyone in the world.
Co-author on Mind’s Seat, a Christian inspirational blog